8:40AM- Well, it didn't take long for me to realize that not everyday is going to be perfect diet-wise. But as they say progress, not perfection. After only 5 hours of sleep (which I never only get 5 hours-- I am a solid 8-10 hours kind of person), I realized that a latte was screaming my name. And it tastes delicious!!!!
Ok- I also decided something else. I think everyday that I drive to work I am going to listen to Jai-Jagdeesh's version of the Kundalini mantra Ek Ong Kar Sat Gur Prasad (as taught by Yogi Bhajan). It is said that this mantra expands our intuitive knowing, and that it is so powerful that you should be mindful of your thoughts because they will manifest. Being that I am at an emotional mile marker in my life right now (you know the decade without love), well, I figured that it wouldn't hurt to get real clear about what I want.
So, here's what I envisioned. (I'm planning on making a physical vision board as well.) I see me opening to a love like I've never known, but not being desperate for it, or needy. I literally think that Kate Fagan & Kathryn Budig are going to have to go up on my board. I picture Buddha Bowls & Mason Jar Salads, afternoons spent in the kitchen with music on and meal prepping. I picture going to the farm store and picking up my veggies & flowers and learning about what our bountiful earth can grow and how it nourishes us. I did picture myself teaching... which so far I have said is not something I'm going to do, so that was interesting. I also pictured a mountain home (this is not the first time I have ever pictured this). I pictured sharing it with someone... and cozy nights right before winter comes... when the sun still sets later, but the nights start to get chillier and the leaves change. I pictured steaming mugs of coffee with a backdrop of pine trees as far as the eye can see.
What does all this have to do with yoga? I don't know, really. But for me it's all connected. Yesterday a friend texted me the best message anyone has ever said to me, it literally gave me chills, she said- "it feels good to be around you. It's like your soul is warm and shiny and I feel warm and shiny in your presence." I want to feel warm and shiny all the time, and I want others to feel warm and shiny in my presence. I know that is not always the case right now, but it is the goal.
Universe, show me what you got!
On my lunch I went to my last C1 with Joy. I counted it up and I've been in her class in the studio 40 times over the past 3 years. How can that be it when she has made such an impact? It felt more like a 100 times. I wish it was, had I known that there would be a limit on the times I would have been there more. That's true of everything in life I suppose.
Those of you close to me know what Joy means to me, and you've probably heard the story a million times. Once upon a time I went to a class at Red Rocks and I was forever changed. Weeks later I went into the studio closest to my job not even knowing that the teacher who had taught at Red Rocks just happened to manage the studio by my job! Synchronitic. Kismet. Serendipitous.
Outside of those 40 classes, I also went to another Red Rocks class led by her, and she dragged my ass to Sculpt classes a few times, I also went to her class on the rooftop of the Rio one summer morning and I loved the way she had our Sun A's timed beautifully to the Beatles "Here Comes The Sun".
Joy showed up to support me at my reading of my essay at Tattered Cover, she's talked with me over tacos about love and life, she even took me to see David Sedaris once (which was so fun).
When I think of the South Boulder CPY studio, I think about Joy. She makes it feel like a home.
In today's class, she said, "Can you resist the urge to fidget? Can you be present with yourself? The good, the bad, the ugly."
How does this person have the gift to see so many of us when at times we might not see ourselves?
After savasana, as I rolled onto my right side, Joy said something like, "Pause here and think with gratitude of all that brought you here."
I remember that first day at Red Rocks. The gratitude which has been so key & powerful in my life.
I might not have improved much in the flexibility department, or the balance department, or dancer pose... but my God how my mind has changed. And it all started with a teacher named Joy at the foot of the mountains and a little bit of gratitude.
Namaste teacher friend, I love you so much!